‘You can’t have your cake and eat it’, or it’s derivative ‘You want to have you cake and eat it’ (usually followed by a glare), is one of the most retarded phrases I know. Imagine being told that that cake on your desk, that beautiful, hypothetical, favourite cake of yours, was all yours. However, you can’t have it and eat it. It must be one or the other, else you want more than you deserve. Never mind that you bought it, or were gifted it.
So why wouldn’t I just eat it then?
The metaphorical meaning of course is that the cake can’t exist in your hands if you’ve eaten it. It’s at this point I’d ask, ‘well why wouldn’t I buy more?’
If you do have to use this phrase because you need metaphors to get your point across, try using the original version; “a man can not have his cake and eate his cake”. At least that makes some sort of sense.
Personally, I’ll be going for the Tamil version: ‘மீசைக்கும் ஆசை கூழுக்கும் ஆசை – desire to have both the moustache and to drink the porridge.‘
What about you guys? What are the phrases you hear that really piss you off with their stupidity? Put them in the comments!
Enjoy your day
P.S. Bonus points to anyone who can tell my why Lil Wayne, DJ Khaled, and Bow Wow are recommended tags for this post. Seriously.